i'm finally telling

look, i had my ponytail!


"shit man, are you gay?" sharime asked
"are you like gay?" sai asked
"r u gay?" iLi tagged
"haha u serious?" lina on msn
"you're straight la, your songs prove it" dhana told me

there's more where that came from. and hey.
i need to clear the air. im queer. im curious.
or whatever pleasant terms you have for it.
and i seriously dont appreciate getting sidelined for it.

i wanna be superman and give you the answer.
but i can never reach an ultimatum.

i asked a particular friend of mine in 2005.
"why are you gay?" i asked
"adam, you can never get an answer for that. its like asking why is the grass green? why is the sky blue?" he said

let me declare, im not an all out gay. even if i am, i would tell you the truth, I AM THE FEMALE
"adam, you're like the girl in this relationship!" jan said
"i know and you're the guy" i replied

the only confusion im facing is me getting sprung on that friend. i cant help it. dont blame me. oh wow. this is why, im not into relationships. its confusing as it is already for me.
being lost is fun.

a politically correct answer for my situation would be "bisexual"
this is why that starbucks convo we had was fun. all my secrets were out. partly. hoohoo.