his million complaints

i love parodies with n'sync i love n'sync in concert. i love 5 white boys singin' in harmony!

funny. i would say. the reason that im bloggin. i know i have better things to do. but there are clear cut reasons as to why im still staring at the screen and not proceed on to doing things that needs my attention. confessions indeed.

there are times when i regret whatever i said but this time, no there are times when i feel attached to home and Science. i dont wanna go back to camp outfield. i wanna laze around. and earn more money at that as well

j.holiday - "bed" "watch the sunlight peaked over the horizon like ooh ooh, ooh ooh, ooh ooh, ooh ooh the sun aint the only thing that's shinin' ooh ooh, ooh ooh, ooh ooh, ooh ooh" from the songwriter of Rihanna's (supposedly britney's) "Umbrella" after like 5 months, the song still "aye, aye, aye" in my head. fact, i manage to write an "aye, aye, aye" song while i was in tekong

headin' for outfield.

you made me realise i dont own a picture of me smiling. a genuine smile. imagine how my orbituary would look like. just like the rest of the pictures. all slumber.

you tracked that person down. you managed to make contact with that person. that person responds positively you spend your time takin' chances the next day on you waited the whole day to see that person online that person, nowhere in sight. out and about you'd assume still you stood there waitin' closer to midnight, you'd almost gave up hope but at that very last minute, that person didnt disappoint you get excited, the opposite party felt likewise that person reveals more sweet secrets secrets that melts your heart, made you stop breathing, made your heart skipped a beat, even twice perhaps made your eyes water made you happiest but when your friend asked about how you felt towards that person your head gets filled with melody but when that person asked about how you felt your heart gets filled with muziq and when you stopped to ask yourself to ask about how you felt you get confused maybe after all the years something still remained and maybe after all the years, that

you only get a view like this on that island. in fact, i'd never appreciated much about nature in the first place. and u can't imagine the number of stars there are for u to admire. if only i could differentiate each and every constellations i see. still, the only part about nature that i really love? the mud. it smoothens your skin. i totally heart that island... to be continued...

"why are you so submissive?" Ms Koh Li Kiang asked me 9 years ago. still rings in my head. during those days. i was a dumbfarque who'd just get into trouble for nothing. at the expense of following my friend's wrongdoing. the 3 of us. but what she didnt know was that i wasnt the innocent submissive kid she thought i was. i'd just fake an innocent face anyway. i was the manipulative one. making them do the crime.

i'm glad i get to manage the pictures. pictures to compile for my graduation ceremony for my batch. secondly, im glad to be out of tekong after spending a few horribly tiring days there. well, next week another outfield at Lim Chu Kang. somewhere i've been. to film actually. the FIBUA village. but erm, theres a few friends i've made in the outfield. here's 3 specimen of what you can find on that resticted area. the random monkey the most talked about animal, babi hutan and deep muziq

26th march. that would mark 1 year. 1 year of me being a graduand from Republic Polytechnic. 1 year of me being a smoker. met Eugene Lim in camp. he asked, "hey man, what happened to you? you didnt used to smoke and all, you were a good guy" i raised my eyebrow double time and said, "people change" well, it all started out with a cigarette session with ghaz and gy. no, dont get me wrong. not blaming them. in fact, im kinda glad it worked out this way. and then the rest is history. stop me?

now this was the song that was the superior factor leading to me huntin' for his album the whole day. its an old release actually. about 3 years ago. rain - in my bed "Rain's World, there's only 1 copy left. but its at taka. i can have them to get the copy sent here." the guy stared at the computer displaying the database. "how long will it take?" "tuesday" "ouh, nevermind, i'll head on there" and whoosh. i kinda half ran out of the store at Capitol. headed to the taxi stand. hopped in and, "uncle, Takashimaya please" and the rest was history.

"remember hairi?" mom asked me "who's that?" "cik tipah's son. the one you bite his hand" she replied. "why? he got into jail?" i replied. __________ hairi, i remembered biting his thumb hard. and then he cried. and later on, my mom placed me inside the same cot as his. i wanted OUT. and how old was i then? 2 years old. that's how far back i can remember. __________ well anyway. "what happened?" i asked "dah khawin (got married)" mom answered "what? when? how old is he?" i was taken aback "today. same age as you" like what on earth. the day after my birthday, someone i knew as a toddler got married already? my age. "kalau dah jodoh. [if theres affinity between them]" mom trailed her sentence "no such thing! is he stupid? dumb? shotgun?" immediately, i ran to Science, whom was still on. i started typing this. ouh, how i cant live without talking to Science. (: bah, and just 2

back to tekong actually. [for field camp]

blah blah blah remember when i mentioned how badly i hate cakes? well i still got cake on my birthday morning. to play fair, i just happily cut it in order not to hurt my folk's feelings. by right, dad should cut it too. cos his 49th was 2 days before mine. bleah blah blah, oh yeah so yes. here's a vomit of what i experienced on 21st march '09. i started out with havin' no plans for the day. left home to joyride on buses by noon. cos i wanted to skip the dzuhur prayers at 1320hrs. evil. but bleah blah blabber i went around town hunting for Rain's 4th album, Rain's World. cabbing all around far east, capitol and lastly taka. and my oh my. taxi queues at taka is horrendous. after a span of 30 mins in line, i managed to get my cab. a big cab rather, all for myself. must be some random birthday luck. and the driver decorated his steering wheel with plenty of 5cent coins. blah blah. 3 cab rides within 2 hours just to hunt. blah blah. went to ikea to meet d-fault he g

you know in tv shows where the lead character suddenly hears voices. though involuntary, i believe that it does happen. like when Fithrin was trying so hard to convince me. (no link!) we discussed during our last midnight guard duty shift, accompanied with a cigarette and coffee. "one day you'll see, its not just about the money. one day a girl will come a make you weak" fit insisted "unlikely" i replied "you won't be a rigger. next time, i'd see you with little adam, and you wont even invite me to your wedding" fithrin added "no you won't. and you mean i have to invite you?" i added sarcasm "see, you're mean. its ok if you dont invite me. i think you wearing a disguise, you like it. you like it when people fear you. like when boarding the bus, you pushed aliff so hard and they didnt dare to push you back. you love the power and the attention" fithrin tried to bring across his point "i'm a peacock, what can

21 on 21. 21 on 21st at 02:14pm. "you did nothing last year as well right?" shawnrick asked apparently, this year as well. this's what happens with an ever shrinking social circle and with a forever expandin' acquaintant rectangle. got an undisclosed amount of blue Yusof Ishaks. well, don't know what i'll be spending. maybe i'll finally get myself a bicycle. and Rain's previous album, Rain's World. maybe a digicam as well to record vlogs and take pics. or maybe some starch burner. or a weighin scale. in fact, i could buy all of that at once today... well, happy 21st adam. i hope you're happy being lonely. (:

pictures thanks to azza. as always. (: now now, i totally remember this. this was at Bukit Batok Nature Reserve. we were havin' our first ever Cross Country. in 2001. i participated in it. and erm, our class won. we had the total best time. ahem. and that beside me was the early copy of Nadhir. i remember being the Treasurer and then the Vice-chairman and then Chairman of the class. this one up here must be Vice-chair or something. hmm. i suddenly recall this. should be in secondary 2. moved in to the new Hillgrove building. and yes, that's Nazri that i'm carrying. the one who appeared in my Final Year Project film, "Carousel Love". yuck to that. this has got to be either secondary 3 or 4. all sweaty and all. took me a while and then i remembered. this must be after our Dance rehearsal and during Choir practice or something. whenever there's a performance slot, we'd juggle 2 presentation. a dance and a song. now this reminds me. time to lose weight [again]

"she looked away and i froze, my heart just skipped a beat so much i could say if i did then would she just let it slip?" -dm 'untitled' ___ decided like this. happy birthday adam. as i wrote this, its exactly showin' 12:00 AM on Science. she's been givin me problems for the previous hour. ___ well, did a bit of research, contemplating about what i'm gonna do tomorrow. see, when i was younger, i'd hope that my 21 would be special. but, as they say, reality stinks. and it kinda proven to me just that. i'mma be spendin' my birthday alone tomorrow. guess i'll just joyride on buses and buy things that i need. ___ an honest confession. people have different mindsets. i noticed mine differs quite a bit. it goes a lil off tangent at times. in fact, i'd been imagining plottin' murder for a tad too much. only yesterday, in camp, did i realise that i could actually snap. and snap i almost did. its amazing how sharp the SOG knife is. don't

people complained. no connecting bus from Pioneer MRT to Jurong West St 92. considerin' the fact that SMRT and SBS Transit are rival companies, its no wonder why this service wasnt drawn up earlier. but as soon as the complaints kept coming, 242 was alas split up from its original route. the number 241 revived. the old 241 used to serve from Jurong Int to Teban Gardens. and then renumbered as 331. and later on merged with 143. so yes, 241 starts today. but thats not my point. ________________ the point is. 5 years ago, i used to frequent 242. i'd always try my best to accompany back home. so i guess, this news has a slight impact on me then. but apart from that. hmmmm.... i don't know.... maybe... hmmm.....

mommy cut my hair this afternoon. it was painful i must say. and then later on, i destroyed the sides myself. so to say, my hair's a bit messed up. but then again. who cares right? been tryin' to go gym religiously by the way. started praying in camp. which was a shock for the rest. maybe i wont anymore back to camp. k bye

demi lovato - don't forget i hearts demi lovato. i still do listen to her whole album in fact. funny thing is that i really hate the guitar and rock and stuff. but when its a female with a guitar, thats another story. (: agreed? miley's lookin' good too nowadays. but yeah.

as we wait to die. let's see. i dropped Deep Red today. yes, i dropped my psp for the first time onto the gravel laced road. and she's badly injured. she suffers a few scratches on her face. not a pretty sight. she fell exactly at 0038hours on 150309. i was doing guard duty. i slot her through my appaulette slot on my shoulder. and then my back ached from standing too long. i bent down and oops. yes, i slot my psp through that random appaulette slot. the one on the shoulder if you didnt know. but the new uniform is on the chest. weird but it was funny, during that less of a second, i managed to think "adam, it's ok. let her have her battle scar" cos im not the type who love scratches. but, oh well

take me out? meeting? gathering? movie? jamming? talkin' cock? drinkin? smokin? sheesha? thosai? anything? anyone? 8222 1711 well, if not then i'll just joyride on the bus. cheers

Master Sergeant "J" made fun of the way i talk in class. as a matter of fact, he's the first person who severely attacked the way i speak. Master Sarge repeated whatever i said in a strong Brit accent. and then he asked Fithrin, "why is he speakin' loike that? got a slang ey?" and no. i just happen to articulate my words. i think before i speak. and then today, Sergent "D" made fun of another guy from another unit. cos he has this thick battered Brit accent. good thing i shutted up in class.

it feels like bein' resurrected from the dead. and god's just given me only less than 24 hours to be with family again. thats how it feels like right now i guess. and thats how a Saturday guard duty feels like. home on Friday evening and burn my Saturday just like that. only get to be back home again Sunday morning but book-in Sunday night. pfft. only reason im burnin' the Saturday now is to ensure an untouched birthday weekend. and Science has got a sister. a year and half younger sister. her name's HAM. and yes, with caps lock on. but my sister's gonna change it to Maths. seriously? im under pressure. ______ in other news, my mom made a comment. "next week got 2 birthdays. bapak and adam (19th march & 21st march)" and then silence. "...i'm gonna get a big cake" she added. now thats a sad problem. dad wont finish the cake cos he aint really got a sweet tooth. and i'm not a fan of cakes. i HATE cakes. i LOATHE cakes. i DESPISE cakes.

[mom placed that photo to remind me of the bastard i was then in poly] after the ablution and gettin' ready for prayers. i close my door. locked. and i just stare out of the window. looking at the lifeforms walking along. not noticing me staring. i stare into the sky. and i question myself millions. some left unanswered. maybe i have lost track and need guidance. thats when i plug in my Black and listen to the muziq. still in a daze. wondering what lies ahead. hoping to find someone to guide me. yes. indeed. please. and 5 minutes later, i unlock my door. open it. step outside. shake my parents' hands as if i just finished praying to god.

mogu mogu dinner on 070309; bridgin' the gap tomorrow marks another chapter in my life. after a week of not having to stay-in, my time is up. within the next 24 hours, i'd be in the comfort of my bed in camp. also, tomorrow, i'd have guard duty. as well as next tuesday. and not to forget this Saturday. yes, Saturday. can i repeat that? Saturday. 14th March. damn, that's like Valentine's or something. Saturday. and the only reason i had to take this Saturday's slot is to ensure that i would not be bothered by Guard Duty on my birthday. yes. my birthday weekend. yes. my 21st this 21st march. anyone wanna take me out? no? well, ok then. i'd expected that. on the plus side. well, as a Transport Supervisor trainee, i must say, our bunk is totally like a chalet. with the abundance of sea breeze and the fans available. the new bed, the newly retrofitted bunk in an old building. it kinda remind me of the old RP in Phoenix Park campus. the classroom in a former jail

the truth about then and now. back in RP, everyone was tech savvy. everyone's got their own lappy. but now in NS, everyone's got their own vehicle. everyone's got their own cars and bikes. and im still dependent on buses and free rides. this explains why i dont have many online friends to talk to. they're prolly busy makin love to their own cars. gahh.

here's an updated speculative future lines in singapore. by the looks of it, im gaugin' it'll be done by 2100. Joo Koon and Pioneer is opened and circle line is almost completed. part of it will open in June 09. digging for the Downtown Line depot has commenced for a while now. that line will start from Bt Panjang to Chinatown. continued by the future Downtown East Line from Chinatown to Expo. Thomson line would be next as well. followed by a Tuas Extension, the NTU LRT and the highly debated Johore line to name a few. and this is the road layout of Toa Payoh in 1982. PIE wasn't ready yet. it was still Jalan Toa Payoh. but apart from that, look to the north. Bishan was only known as Kwong Wai Siew Pek San Teng Cantonese Cemetery. ah, so thats the name. but then again. i know you readers do not care. but its these little details that make me smile. im real easy to please actually.

020202 that was the day Hillgrove Secondary moved in to her new premises. the first day started out without any stall in the canteen opened. oh, and it was deane's birthday as well. i was 14. and on 101002, something else happened. but well, that was yesteryear. wont harp on it. so, my sis went back to visit our ex school and she got a snapshot of her meal that day. i only found out after browsing through my handphone that she was using. well, i use that Sony E phone of mine once a week only, with thanks to my NS phone. so yeah, theres a western stall there now. it sure looks pleasing. but my sis said the food sucked. looks like they blended the cabbage and carrot to make coleslaw. and erm, its 2 bucks for the cutlet set and an additional dollar for the added spaghetti. _____________ the kettle and in camp, during my stay-in period. theres one thing i love. my 1.4L kettle. yes. my kettle. cos to solve the hunger pangs, i depend on my milo sachets. and sometimes, hot coffee, ginger

Black, otherwise known as my iPod, have yet to get new muziq added into her. the recently added albums includes Jesse McCartney, David Archuleta, Musiq Soulchild, Twilight soundtrack and John Legend. i've been waiting for new releases. something fresh and new to listen to while in camp. something to give me more inspiration to write new songs. so, i'm currently waiting for the release of these 2 albums. both sophomore albums of each artistes Day 26 and J. Holiday. Day 26 - Forever In A Day J. Holiday - Round 2 well apart from that news. it seems like i'd have to make a purchase of Rain's previous album Rain's World. oh wow. that was ages back. and speaking of Black earlier, i kinda know what i might be gettin for my birthday this year. so erm, its gonna be Black's new little sister. greatness.

back in my early days offshore. we were supposed to keep a so called journal. it was like blogging to me. just that i would have gotten into a whole lot of trouble if my superiors had actually read what i'd wrote down. it was a little too skimpy. but i liked it that way. it was straight to the point. my platoon mates could actually write down a day's worth of reflection on 2-3 pages of paper. me on the other hand had 4 days entries on just one page. tsk tsk tsk. these few dates below are actually days that i remember living thru'. 13/10/08 Aqua. Fun. Rifle cleaning. No fun. Tomorrow EI talk, maybe fun. lookin' forward to it. & i'm hungry 15/10/08 Urban Operation was fun. but gettin' into trouble for drawing on the wall is no fun at all. Bang Bang!! 18/10/08 I passed IPPT. Bookout time. 19/10/08 Booking in. Report sick. 20/10/08 Sickbay. Ssshh... 21/10/08 Early part of the day at MO. Later part of the day slack. I lost 1.2kg but official records said i gained

you know i am glad that my brother from another mother, bandmate, producer d-fault's music career is doin' fine and dandy back in his mainland. with his recent single release, his album managed to sell 8000+ copies. he's excited bout the news and i share the same joy as well. now i think that would be hard for a singaporean to achieve. except maybe if your name has a specific Batisah or Mirza in it. then that would be no mean feat for you. but yes. the point of this topic? to remind myself to get back to my lyrics book and start writtin' songs. to remind myself that i still owe dhana some cash for gettin our track produced in sri lanka to remind myself that we need upbeat happy love songs to hopefully please the SL crowd to remind myself that i still need to write new songs the point of that? write and produce songs in camp.

its that i need a car urge. the only thing stopping me is of course, i havent saved enough to buy my own mpv i havent clock enough mileage yet to get my class 3 and 4 apart from that, im so called saving to get my class 2b license. riding a motorbike aint that hard after all. now, lets not forget my class 5 after ORD. mmhmm but all i need is just one accident while in NS to dash that hopes and dreams. and point number 2. stop it. im not a driver. im a transport supervisor. i duno how many times i have to repeat that in camp. just when seniors start to look down on us and ask "y'all driver trainees?" and we'll say, "no, transport supervisor" and then there'll be awkward silence or them acting smart and say "ah, so you're gonna be superiors. gonna be in charge of drivers" and yes. the thought of me reprimanding my man is one thought that will be hard to be missed. ouh. the power. ouh. the stress.

7th March on this day. there's only one song i'd listen to. without fail today, the first song i'd listen to was what i listened to 5 years ago. when she wanted to alight at her stop, i'd made sure she takes one loop first. delaying her alighting point. prolonging the time i spent with her. followed her in school while she maintained order and peace. "yes, what you do you want?" she would ask "you" "you've already got me" and then the day would go by without any wrongs. funny how secondary school relationships keep you going in years to come. the past is a funny thing. (: and oh ya! happy birthday to you, mimi

hitman ironman 21 ladder 49 slumdog millionaire so, to make the memories last, after watchin all those movies for this week, i so NEED to get the hitman triple pack. i'd never liked hitman. reason being, each time i'm searching for a particular truck game at Popular or wherever, i'd end up finding hitman first. there. my simple no-brainer reason. as said. need to know basis only.

there's a real troll under the bridge. remember the story about The Three Billy Goat Gruff? about 3 goats meeting up with a greedy troll on a bridge. well, upon seeing the troll that time, thats the first thing that came in mind. i chanced upon him a few days back. he was working on the junks he collected. unclean and unshaven. he made the small space under the pedestrian bridge, his home. making do with shelter made by cardboard boxes and rectangular biscuit and cooking oil tin container. i'll make an attempt to catch a snapshot of him probably tomorrow.

so i asked her as to why she got so upset suddenly when we were about to end our convo. it was as if i did something wrong and as if i'd offended her real bad. she seemed pissed. i didnt realise my cue was given. she asked me to figure it out myself. i gave up. and then. i pleaded. begging to know the reason. "u did not ask fer my number! dats why..." and thats what she told me. strucked down. dumbofounded. enclosed in my own world. i didnt realised it. looks like i need to socialise more. so foolish of me. in which i did rectify the situation.

great. what's been up with me is this. as mentioned way too many time in the utmost gentle manner ever possible. i am done with my driver course. i belong to the early bunch who finished our TP. TP was special cos unlike the member of the public who did their TP test using civilian cars, we used out big lorries for the test. so whos test was tougher? u decide. we were supposed to get OFF. but today, tsk tsk, i ended up doing loads of cleaning. and so i guess tomorrow as well. til 9th march! transport supervisor course. back to route marches and field camp. after fieldcamp now without field camp and route marches plus loads of diabetes Milo from the canteen. and yes. looking back at pictures, i need field camp and route marches. getting fatter. tsk tsk. need gym badly. its been 3 weeks without the treadmill and weights. --------------------------- and my greatest camp companion apart from my PSP would be the books that accompanied me through the night. sleeping at past midnight just